It's MY Wedding.

I really am planning my wedding.

H2B rarely has any opinions, hardly knows what is going on other than the date and I think is because he wants me to plan "my day" perhaps out of a hidden guilt. Which would be fine if I had "my day" planned out since I was 8 and knew everything I wanted from napkin fabric to the colour of my bridesmaid's underwear.

But I am not that person.

As much as I plan stuff and love to organise things, I always had it in my mind I wouldn't be getting hitched here. I never walked through the city and decided that church or garden would be "awesome to get married in someday". I did for other people, "Oh Ms Smith would suit that dress" or "Fred and Ginger would look lovely with a red carpet surrounded by white roses aisle in that park".

When we first got engaged, my first thought was check out the registry office and australian laws in regards to getting married over seas or interstate. I downloaded Vegas brochures, I saw 101 images of women in wedding dresses and men in suits with the eiffel tower behind them and planned a world trip (or 3) with the idea we'd get hitched and use that as our starting point to do some travelling and honeymoon so when we come back we'll be surprise we're married, have a nice party with nearest and dearest at our house and have a slideshow of our holiday snaps. Our parents and H2B's brother would be invited and told of course.

But H2B wanted none of that. "You'll regret it later" he says. That's his reasoning and he sticks by it. I doubt it. In fact I hate him for it and I don't think that is the best way to start of a marriage but I am sure when I finally get to Europe I will get over it. I hope. Otherwise it will be brought up (like it does now) in every arguement we have for the next X years.

I guess the wedding kind of shows the root of my planning plant. It's location is 2 hours away from home. As far away I could manage, keeping it somewhere nice I like and in the state as he also disagreed with a wedding in QLD, VIC, SA and TAS. I don't know why I have the urge to get married away from WA. Maybe it is my hate for Perth or the fact I am not a big fan of family and this way could escape it all. I don't think he is 100% on Down South either but puts up with it since he has disagreed with so much already.

No point, just a little rant as I am impatiently waiting the venue co-ordinator to reply to my email about the appointment I had with her a couple of weeks ago and emailed her about last Friday.

And also on how I have had to comprimise so god dam much with so many aspects of this stupid day. I've changed theme. I'm fighting with myself about bridesmaid (lovely argument though any psychic's nearby.. stay out of my head cause this shit is nasty), I have settled for my wedding dress in more ways than one, I have a feeling while still on the keep everyone happy bandwagon I may end up in Bali for a honeymoon, I can't find a god dam pair of perfectly amazing special wedding shoes for me!!!!

End rant.